The Escaflowne Christmas Carol
by CallingNewo
Summary: A parody of A Christmas Carol. The Escaflowne cast embarks on a new story. Will Dilandau Scrooge make it through the night? R&R Please.


An Escaflowne Christmas Carol  
A Tenkuu no Escaflowne and A Christmas Carol Parody  
A Joint Fic between Elijah-Wood-Mini-Fan-Club and Sweet Roses  
  
Disclaimer: Tenkuu No Escaflowne, or the American version, The Vision of Escaflowne was created by Sunrise Entertainment. We disclaim all that has to do with the ownership of the characters and related themes from Tenkuu no Escaflowne. The novel A Christmas Carol, by Charles Dickens, and all characters and related themes are also being used, but we hold no credit for their creation. Also, we do not own any of the accomplished actors mentioned in this story. Enjoy.  
  
Actors:  
  
Scrooge - Dilandau  
  
Ghosts - Jacob Marley - Miguel Christmas Past - Gatti Christmas Present - Chesta Christmas Future - Dalet  
  
Scrooge's Nephew - Allen (In this he will be a brother)  
  
Allen's family - Milerna  
  
Allen's Guests - Folken and Eyria  
  
Bob Cratchet - Van  
  
Van's Family - Hitomi  
  
-Prince Chid (Tiny Tim)  
  
-Guimel  
  
-Naria  
  
-Merle  
  
Scrooge's father - Isaac  
  
Past - women he was to marry - Reece Witherspoon  
  
Sister - Julia Styles Present - poor-donation collectors - Kianu Reeves, Brad Pitt  
  
maid Meg Ryan  
  
Future - women who sell everything - Julia Roberts, Jennifer Lopez man they sell it to - Eddie Murphy  
  
***Scene One***  
  
Dilandau Scrooge and his fellow accountant, Van Cratchet are balancing  
the books in a crummy old shop. Van gets up to put more coal on the fire but Dilandau stingily refuses to use up such precious resources.  
  
"Van, I stingily refuse to use up such a precious resource."  
  
"But Dilandau, Sir, there is hardly any heat in here and the fire is almost out."  
  
"Yeah well, the coal is bloody expensive this time of year."  
  
"Speaking of this time of year, tomorrow is Christmas Day and I -"  
  
"You want it off, don't you?" Interjects Dilandau.  
  
"Well, Yes. Yes I would." Van replies with hope-filled eyes.  
  
"Very well. But be in two hours early on boxing day."  
  
"Thank you, Sir." Replies Van.again. Just then there was a knock at the door. Van is asked to answer it.  
  
"Answer that, will you." Dilandau says. Van opens the door. There are two men in top hats. They are Kianu Reeves and Brad Pitt.  
  
"Good day good Sir." Greets Brad.  
  
"We collect money for the poor." Declares Kianu.  
  
"Yes, yes we do." Brad duplicates.  
  
"And we are wondering if you would like to make a donation." Kianu declares again.  
  
"Yes, yes we are." Brad duplicates again. Dilandau immediately pushes a smiling Van out of the way.  
  
"Go away! We will not give you two money."  
  
"But, Sir, it is Christmas." Declares Kianu yet again.  
  
"Yes, yes it is," says Brad  
  
"Bah hum bug" Yells Dilandau and slams the door in their faces. Van sweat drops and then takes a seat. Dilandau sits down as well. Just then, Dilandau's brother, Allen, walks through the door with a lively Christmas spirit.  
  
"Hello brother dear, have you noticed my lively Christmas spirit?"  
  
"What do want and why are you here? Do you want money again?"  
  
"Actually I have come to invite you to have Christmas dinner with my wife, Milerna, and I."  
  
"Oh no not that unbearable hussy again! She talks on for hours." Says Dilandau. Allen ignores that remark and continues, "Are you sure?"  
  
"Yes I am sure she's a hussy."  
  
"No, no, will you come to dinner?"  
  
"No, no I won't."  
  
"Oh well. Merry Christmas!" He leaves, hanging a wreath on his old green door on his way out.  
  
"Bah hum bug." Dilandau yells after him and shakes his fist. The clock rings and they both pack and leave for their homes.  
  
* * *  
  
Dilandau steps up to his mansion door, snow whirling around him, and he pulls his cheap scarf tightly around his neck and mouth. He reaches for the handle of the door when, suddenly, his goblin doorknocker turns into the face of his late (which means he's dead) partner, Miguel Marley. Miguel says, "boo!"  
  
Dilandau, for a moment, stares blankly in shock. His eye twitches and he shudders, but then he shrugs it off and enters his house. The house is cold and dark, because stingy Mr. Scrooge would not pay for heat, or lighting. He settles down with a glass of red wine and cold "President's Choice" gruel. He has a single candle despite the very large, unlit fireplace he sits close to.  
  
Suddenly, with lots of warning that Dilandau had disregarded, the sound of clanking chains rises up from the lower level. They begin to slowly move up the stairs. Dilandau shrinks with fear. So he does what he always did when he was afraid-shrinks with fear.  
  
The ghostly apparition of Miguel Marley enters the room, but Dilandau Scrooge does not turn in his chair to see.  
  
"Hey! Scrooooooge. It is I, Marley!"  
  
At that moment, Dilandau's fear melts away like butter on a sausage. He turns to greet his old friend most heartedly. "My old friend! I most heartedly greet you!"  
  
"Hey, Dilandau."  
  
"Miguel. no hard feelings about the whole death thing?"  
  
"Nah! Anyway. I came to tell you something. now what was that.?"  
  
"Oh forget about that! It is good to see you!"  
  
"Yeah! You too!"  
  
Dilandau's face becomes sly and mischievous. "Hey. remember that time in the pub in London, Asturia."  
  
"Yeah," chuckles Miguel. "We were so drunk that night.."  
  
The two of them pause, blinking for many moments. Dilandau finally breaks the silence. "Come to thing of it. I don't remember anything about that night.."  
  
"Yeah. same here.." Miguel sighs deeply. "Speaking of which, I wish I could remember why I have come. It had something to do with Spain."  
  
"Spain? You mean that place on the Mystic Moon?"  
  
"No, that can't be right." Miguel begins to ponder in a pace, but is hindered by all of the ethereal chains linked to his person. "Damn chains! What a pain in the . wait! That's it!  
  
Miguel clears his throat audibly, and changes his tone to the classic ghost sound. "Scrooooooge. If you do not mend your ways, you will become like me in the afterlife, dooooooomed to wander the earth wrapped in the links of all the torture I caused. You have now to change your ways while your alive."  
  
"That sounds like a death threat to me?" Dilandau comments.  
  
"No not at all" Miguel does the shifty eye thing and snickers a bit. "Ahem, you will be visited by three ghosts before this night is throoooough, and some of the early morn. They will guide you to righteousness."  
  
"What? Ghosts? Phantoms? Ghouls? Poltergeists? Spirits? But I'm a good boy." He whines.  
  
"That's a lie. and you know it. We did awful things in life while I was alive and you are continuing your evil ways even more so! So don't you deny it!"  
  
"Wha- never! I am shocked and repulsed," he says, his face shows shock and repulsion. "How do I know you are really here? You could be those people to whom I denied money earlier.'  
  
Miguel opens and closes his mouth like a fish and then finally says, 'Three ghosts Mr. Scrooooooge. Three!'  
  
"Three! That's so cliché"  
  
Miguel sighs and disappears and blows out the candle just so that Dilandau can blink stupidly in the darkness. Just when Dilandau thought he was gone, only his mouth puffs back and says "three!" rather quickly, then fades back to nothingness.  
  
"Yeah. I got it." Mutters Dilandau, blinking stupidly in the darkness. "I'm going to bed." And he goes to bed. 


End file.
